Never Stop Learning - June 2026

Tennis coaches face many challenges that they must navigate; parents' involvement may be at the top of that list. Start by recognizing that the parent who chose you to coach their child hired you to help optimize their child's tennis game. It’s not likely they were seeking out a tennis coach/family therapist. Focus on what you can and can’t do as a tennis coach. Why, there is one thing that is always true: coaches who choose to label the parents as the problem when their children are struggling will seldom retain those clients.

The fact is, in almost all cases, no matter who intervenes, the parents will stay involved. Which means if a coach sees this issue as a hindrance to a player's improvement, they will need to engage in a careful process of communication and diplomacy.

To add to this challenge, the tennis environment is arguably the most competitive one-on-one sport in the world. The result is an extremely elevated emotional roller coaster that is easily transferable to anyone involved. During such ups and downs, these challenges are often not recognized or considered a problem. In fact, because this relationship is very stimulating, the opposite is true; the wins and successes easily outweigh the times of conflict or failure.  

That cooperation is not only a successful way to strengthen their bond, but it may eventually provide a gateway to gradually helping that young player achieve autonomy if they so desire.

Let’s review what most coaches recognize. First, we all know that most parents want the best for their child. The motivation behind that may vary, but the passion and emotional investment can never be severed, at least in their child's developmental years. The difficulty is that it doesn’t take much for their passion to turn into an obsession.

Second, there is a natural pride that easily transfers with success. This, too, is very difficult to dismiss. For the parent, it’s just a small transferable emotional step to co-enjoy that feeling of success with their child. 

Thirdly, because there is often an elevated degree of success when their parents are fully invested, that success will encourage the parents to do more.

Lastly, most parents feel that criticism of the child's performance will be more impactful and motivating, even though they may know that is not the case; it is a common, desperate direction to take, coupled with a lack of patience when trying to elevate their child's performance.

There are likely more reasons than the four mentioned, but let’s look at these issues and try to better understand their characteristics and the adjustments a coach can take to continue having a productive relationship with everyone involved.  

Been there, wish I knew that…

For many parents, the time in life when they could have achieved high levels of athletic success is behind them. They are regretfully aware of that and want to make sure that their child also does not miss the opportunities that youth provides. This all starts with an act of caring, but sometimes it can become a bit too much. Often, without even realizing it, this well-intended oversight slips from caring and concerned to evolving into excessive “helicopter parenting.”

Everyone loves getting attention…

It is normal to want and enjoy getting attention from others, which often includes publicity and fame. The attention a young player gets often spills over onto the parent. It may begin by just being a proud parent, but it can easily go further. Receiving this attention validates their efforts and can result in the parents being unknowingly swept up in the process. As this new emergence becomes more significant and recognized, it transitions from being exceptional to the new norm and can take on a life of its own.  

A little goes a long way, so you would think more would go further…

They also realize that the value of providing positive feedback allows a student to enjoy the process and helps improve their self-image. Self-esteem is far more motivating and will help a young player to do their best at what they are trying to achieve.  

If you think that these issues have common solutions or suggestions, nothing could be further from the truth. Every family has their own history and unique characteristics. Those unique variations will require a coach to approach each family with an open playbook to all possible solutions. After all, if there were a blueprint to follow for addressing these complicated problems, few coaches and families would ever experience any sudden or maybe prolonged frustrations.

It may be best to consider these hurdles as the norm for most families with promising young players. That approach will open the door to seeing the many possibilities and solutions that might be available. But maybe most importantly, accepting this possibility will open the door to a more harmonious relationship with both the player and the parents. Never forget, no parent with such an emotional investment wants to be referred to as “the problem.”

This issue is very trying for most coaches. Still, if you take the approach that the parents will be part of the process of that child’s improvement and eventual achievement, many of these hurdles that will be encountered can be processed and minimized.  

In 1976, he took over as head professional/tennis director at the Mt. Tam Racquet Club in Larkspur, California, and added the title and responsibilities of general manager in 1982. After 48 years, he retired to work exclusively in helping others in the industry. 

In 2010, he was awarded “Manager of the Year” for the USPTA NorCal Division and the “Manager of the Year” at the USPTA World Conference. Rod has written several books, including “Down Your Alley” in 1993, “Playing Into the Sunset” in 2013, and most recently, “325 Ways to Play Tennis.”

He also produced the “Facility Manager’s Manual” and the “Business Handbook for Tennis Pros,” which is distributed by the TIA.

Rich Neher: Cliff Notes from a RSPA Conversation

I had the pleasure of spending a couple of hours at the RSPA’s Southern California Convention on May 4th. What a great event organized by Simon Paek and Carlos Cruz-Aedo and held at the fabulous (and very busy!) Burbank Tennis Center.

Simon Paek had arranged for an on-court conversation with Peter, which I found both fascinating and enlightening from a “How to be successful coaching a college team” perspective. Peter handed out a 1-page document with some thoughts on his teaching philosophy, mostly abbreviated. He allowed me to talk about it and quote from it in this article. Thank you, Peter.

Before I get to the Cliff Notes, here are some other nuggets I learned about PS:

Peter Smith…
…lived in and worked at La Costa under the legendary Pancho Segura
…other regulars there were Bobby Riggs and Lorne Kuhle
…learned tennis from his brother, who died young at age 36 from Aids.
…loves competing. “I’d rather compete and lose than not compete!”
…important: “Watching people change through tennis. “Boys to men” in college.”
…top memories: selling out Fresno State (12,000 paid seats) and winning the 4th consecutive NCAA championship for USC.
…College tennis losing teams trend: we all need to get involved. Get kids to watch.
…Be positive. Always. A compliment goes a lot further than an insult. Catch a kid doing something right!
…the highs and lows of college tennis: intoxicating.
…loves skateboarding (fun fact)
…Advice for coaches: Know yourself. Don’t be someone you’re not. Know your strengths and weaknesses.

Okay, here are Peter Smith’s Cliff Notes:

• Dreams - What are your dreams?

• Goals - What type of game do you want to play?

• The process - Players have to buy into the process. Have to buy into the repetition of tennis – have to enjoy the process of working hard to get better. They have to accept & believe in your coaching.

• I really don’t think anything I do is that special, it’s how you do it that makes it special. Great intensity. Have to get after it every day.  If the player wants to listen and work hard, then there is a chance, but as a coach, you have to have a plan, and you have to bring energy.

• Towards the end of my career at SC, if I was convinced that a kid wanted to work hard and listen to me, then I was all in on them. 

• Kids have to be able to play from all spots on the court. Iva – Indian Wells – first match, neither person came into the net – 2^nd match vs Paolini, there was so much net play. Yes, I am always teaching young kids how to volley – when you learn to volley at a young age, you have no fear of the net. 

• Rule #! In tennis – Get the ball in. If you want to win you better get the ball in. Being steady – how do you win when you are  11 12 13 14, which is important at every level.  If you focus on just being steady, you are not going to develop weapons.  You have to have an offensive mindset. Aggressive big targets – good margins.  I never tell my students to be steady. 

• Keep tennis simple.  When I play, when I coach my players, I try and make it simple for them. 

• Directionals – drill. Hit quality balls – use depth and angles to get control of the point and then dominate. 

  Hand feed- Deep

  Racquet feed - Deep

  Racquet feed - Angle – Heavy – Drive CC – Drive DTL – Drop shot – Approach shot

  Deep Corners

• Taking the ball early – taking time away. I was coached by the master of this, Pancho Segura – and that still works 100%.

• DTL balls – have to be able to finish a point – they have to be able to hit the ball straight. 

  Alley rally –

  Feed – extreme change of direction down the line.

  Hit change of direction.

• Holding the baseline

  Learning to redirect the ball

• Hitting balls at different heights

  Feed different heights –

  Ball high go high/height of ball

• Working on the volley –

  Volley warm-up

  Closing volley

  Turn around volley

  Groundstroke approach volley overhead volley

• Serve

  Serve & Volley

• Return –

  Middle CC

  Middle inside in

• Doubles – we work on doubles every day at clinics. It’s fun, it teaches you so many things that are applicable to singles, and it is crucial for any type of team play. 

• I really don’t think anything I do is that special, it’s how you do it that makes it special. Great intensity. Have to get after it every day.

• I love building the foundation. I see a lot of kids, and a lot of them you see say oh man, not that drill. Great players believe and buy in. I will say I am always looking towards the future. I don’t have a ton of interest in teaching someone to be a good 12 or 14-year-old player for me, I am focusing on age 16-20.

• I believe you should have a strength, and that strength should be your serve and forehand, but you should be able to play from every spot on the tennis court. 

• Stage 1 

  Making tennis enjoyable and teaching technique. 

  Steve Sr Balloon tennis.

• Obviously, technique is crucial. Grips and techniques will hold you back as your game progresses.  The longer you wait to change a stroke or a grip, the harder it becomes. 

  Yes, I am teaching all aspects of the game 

• Build foundation 

  Hand feeding. - I love hand feeding. Makes them use their legs and feet and makes them create racquet head speed.   Give them targets.  I would rather them miss long than short in the warm-up.

• Hand feed. I want quality groundstrokes –

  What is a quality groundstroke? 

• Dwin drill Deep ball - short ball 

• Directional Drill 

• We make tennis so complicated, I think. At the simplest form, it is a battle of cc and middle shots, trying to get control of the middle of the court.  For me, once I get my opponent hit in the middle of the court, I feel like I win 80 % of those points.

• Change of direction.  Getting people to hit the ball straight is crucial for the next step.  

  Alley rally. 

• Woody Blocker - hitting the outside of the ball. Pressure exaggerates everything. 

• Holding the baseline –

  Feed balls deep and hard – open stance, great contact point, step in the court if possible.

• I love depth, and that is my foundation for all great groundstrokes.  Craig O’Shannesy

  My goal for groundstrokes is to create short balls. 

  Out wide ball - angle the ball off.

• Deep drill plus 1 minus 1 – Corners

• Short balls. Take the ball early. 

  Getting it out in front - hit it off the front. Stay through the stroke longer. 

• Pancho - taking the ball early and holding the baseline- the person who hits the first quality shot usually wins the point.

• Over and over short balls

  4 Ball drill

• Volley - understand how to hit a volley to finish points.  

• Farah volley drill. 

  Need to focus on your feet and shoulders.

• Approach - Volley Drill 

  Cc Fhd approach DTL volley volley overhead volley. 

• Serve & volley drill

• Serve & volley play drill 

• Return – you have to practice your return everyday. 

• I don’t mind execution errors if your intention is correct. Correct intention is everything.

• Put some lead tape on your racquet. You can’t play with a stock racquet.

   

This was quite the entertaining learning event. Nicely moderated by Simon Paek.